V for Victim

How to stop your child being a victim of bullying?

Today is about stopping your child being a victim of bullying. So, and this as someone who was badly bullied myself, nothing gives me greater sense of- just it's beyond words. It's beyond words and the feeling, the fantastic feeling that I get when I help a child overcome bullying, when I help a child see through what's been going on, when I work with a parent of a child who's been bullied and empower that parent to stop the child suffering. 

And the very first time I had this feeling with seven years ago when a little girl told me at the end of a workshop I'd run with her school. And with our class, being there, the workshop had been kind of 35 or 40 minutes or so, a couple of minutes on bullying. But something that that little girl had picked up on in those two minutes that I talked to her about my story of bullying and how bullying works and why people believe in that sort of stuff, and how our feelings work. 

She told me that she didn't want to tell the rest of the class because this is the shame around bullying, you know, I felt that shame. And I didn't want to tell my parents that I'd been bullied. So get to the point, get to the point on it. 

She told me that she could go back to dance class. And she told me how she stopped going to dance class because she'd been bullied. She hadn't told her parents. She hadn't told the dance teacher, she just stopped going to dance class. And she'd had an insight, she had a new idea, something new, a new understanding that popped into her head. And that new realisation that nothing on the outside of us can make us feel any way whatsoever, stuff on the outside can’t hurt us. So that old saying that sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt us became true for that girl.

She realised that feelings are an inside job. And nothing outside of us can make us feel any particular way. She was going to go back to dance class. There was no two ways about it. She looked me in the eye and she was definite. She was going back to dance class. Those kids weren't going to make her a victim any more. And that takes my breath away. And I've seen this time and time and time again. Kids have told me exactly the same thing. They've told me that they are bully-proof, that other kids can't upset them anymore. They've told me that names- they'll just be able to walk past the kids that try and pick on them and you know what? The kids that don't react, the bullies stop picking on kids that don't react. So if you're struggling, if your child your child is doing this and obviously that's going to impact on you as a parent, then get in touch and let's get this sorted. 

Let’s stop your child being a victim of bullying. Let’s build their self-esteem so other kids stop bullying them. Let’s put an end to this bullying.